PROGRESS is when I shoot a 71 and it's an improvement from my last game
FRUSTRATION is when I somehow hit a perfect 4-iron off the tee into an excellent location in a sand bunker, then effortlessly pitch it out of the bunker onto the green for a chance at scoring par for the very first time in my entire life, and then... well, um... watch the video:
EMBARRASSMENT is when Larry displays his golf swing.
VINDICATION is when I'm so hungover and exhausted that I'm unable to put full sentences together all morning, like I'm the Asian equivalent of Paula Abdul or something, and I just want to get the 9th hole over with so I can go home and pass out, but I'm thinking about the choke on my par attempt a couple holes ago, and I'm seeing red because the old people behind us are crossing their arms and making comments. I'm raging and I hear Kid Rock's "Bawitaba" in my head and I mutter something about winds coming from the northeast and I just let it rip, I express my emotions through my golf swing, I whack it so hard my boxer shorts reveal themselves to the world, and the ball glides impressively across the sky, my greatest, most prodigious drive that I have ever hit. My scream travels even farther than I hit the ball as dogs everywhere start to howl and startled pigeons fly off and upset babies cry in the distance.
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20 Comments
Fuck You. My score was 2 worse than yours prick.
Very true. Good thing there's no footage of me chopping away at the ball in the sand traps.
With all that screaming you do after every shot it seems I'm surprised you don't get kicked off the course.
I really got a kick out of how angry you got...."SONOFABITCH!"
Haha, Larry I believe Pete was referring to himself during the second hole. You shoulda see him hacking furiously at the ball while getting sand all over the green. It must have taken 10 swings to get the ball out of the sand and after causing mass devastation to the land. The man cutting the lawn was curiously watching, as well as the people sitting in the cart waiting for us. I'm surprised the lawn guy didn't give him the boot himself.
Haha is that you giving the play by play commentary in the 2nd video? Dude I can't believe Larry didn't punch you in the face for all that sarcasm you were dishing out.
Larry's my bro, it's all good. We all know he only whiffed because a fighter jet was flying ten feet above his head at that exact moment of his swing.
Your swing is as bad Charles Barkley's.
I agree with Mark. Uggggggggly swing.
But I give you points for enthusiasm.
It looks much better than it did in that video from a few weeks ago. So you are improving! There is hope for you yet to someday become a proficient golfer.
haha my favorite is the video of larry =)
You made it sound like a Tiger Woods tee shot....that probably barely made 200
Pull up your pants.
Agree...and speaking of pants, what the hell kind of golf course lets you wear jeans?
I just think its funny that you hear Bawitaba of all songs in your head when trying to summon testosterone.
Joanna -- Yeah, I was having wardrobe malfunctions all morning. The tie string on my shorts kept getting undone. But at least Dave and Larry got quite a show.
Stewart -- The same kind of golf course that charges 14 bucks to play 9 holes.
Will -- Don't you? But I also alternate between Mudvayne's "Dig" and DMX's "Ruff Ryder Anthem". Grr, arf arf.
This was great. In the first video that ball never even had a chance.
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