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Cao Boi and Indians

I used to think that I was the coolest, most colorful, most intriguing Asian personality in the history of the universe. I was serious about it too, and so was everyone else I knew. I'd sit with people at a bar, sip on my beer and confidently ask: "Can you honestly name ONE Asian person more interesting than me? Try and think, and tell me if you can think of anyone." And they, each one of them, would not be able to.

Well, I was wrong about myself.

If you watched Survivor: Cook Islands tonight -- and you probably didn't because the last 11 seasons of the show, save for the one with Elizabeth Hasselbeck, the one in Australia I think, has been majorly boring and formulaic -- then you noticed that tribes are now organized into races: White, Black, Hispanic, and Asian. They're calling this show a social experiment, as if there was any possible way you could present the idea without offending people.

Anyway. Obviously, I'm rooting for the Asians -- the Puka Tribe -- to succeed. And they most likely will, with everyone in that tribe possessing washboard abs to go along with their natural superhuman Asian cognitive aptitude.

I'll tell you why I was wrong about myself being the coolest Asian ever: Cao Boi.

His name is pronounced Cowboy, he's Vietnamese, and he's been the one guy to really stand out so far. Already, in that one hour season premiere, he has emerged as my favorite Survivor castmember since Rudy the Navy Seal from Season One. Read his biography and try to tell me you aren't impressed. There just aren't Vietnamese people like that out there.

The defining moment of tonight's show, to me at least, was when Cao Boi cured one of the tribe member's headaches by giving him a Hindu dot -- which, if I was high off of something, could be interpreted as his statement on the fact that the producers of Survivor believe that the world's people can be categorized into four groups, even though Indians make up about a fifth of the world's population.

Thursday, September 14, 2006

12 Comments

#1 Mark

What fortunate luck! First post!

I, nor most people back in the day ever fully subscribed to yer view that you were 1) Asian... and... if you were actually Asian... still in debate.. that you are 2) "the coolest, most colorful, most intriguing Asian personality in the history of the universe"

are you Asian? I always thought you were a whitey obsessed with tupac.

Boobs, man, boobs.

Us ignorant Americans remember:
Chow fung fat LI
Jackie Chan.
Charles Bark Li
Gnarles Bark Li
Christopher Tucker's indomitable moves
Jet Li's slow-ass meanderings...
c'mon.

September 15, 2006 01:47 AM
#2 Pete

Don't make me Ang Lee. You wouldn't like me when I'm Ang Lee.

September 15, 2006 08:24 AM
#3 lynn

that's awesome that his name is pronounced 'cowboy'. it reminds me of how kids used to call you 'human' because your first and middle vietnamese name is Hieu Minh. haha

September 15, 2006 09:46 AM
#4 pt

there are quite a few vietnamese people out there who have done the things that cao boy has done, and those who have gone far and beyond what he has done. you just need to seek them out. they're interesting people with awesome stories to tell of their ventures...

September 15, 2006 08:58 PM
#5 Pete

I dunno man I've yet to find a 40 year old Vietnamese man who sky dives AND cures headaches.

September 16, 2006 09:33 AM
#6 pt

dude, i'm half cao boi's age and even i can cure headaches. ALL vietnamese people have that skill...haha

September 16, 2006 02:48 PM
#7 Pete

All you need is a quarter and that green ointment shit, right? :)

September 16, 2006 04:41 PM
#8 pt

yep, but a nickel or dime would suffice =)

but that technique is used to cure aches and pains that may have been induced by a fever or something...=P

you had the right idea though!

September 16, 2006 10:28 PM
#9 Tracey

Actually, "Cao Boi" is not pronounced exactly "cowboy", but similarly. His real name is not Cao Boi. "Cao Boi" in Vietnamese means cowboy, so I think he chooses this name coz he wants to be a cowboy haha..

September 17, 2006 06:47 AM
#10 Mark

I like the Asian scientist from Jurassic Park. The way he was able to extract DNA from pre-historic insects was amazing.

September 17, 2006 06:56 PM
#11 Mark

Yeah, the only DNA that is pertinent to this is the samples you left on my pillow back at NIU. :(

September 21, 2006 01:31 AM
#12 Randi

"Obviously, I'm rooting for the Asians -- the Puka Tribe -- to succeed."

Whatever bitch!! GO WHITIES!! ;) We'll see how you silly slants do tonight.

(Am I pushing it with my pretend racism??)

FWIW, Cao Boi does seem like a crazy coo' mofo. ;)

September 21, 2006 07:09 PM