I'm a Nguyen-er, not a loser

In my attempt to reach full adulthood and maturity, I've changed my AIM screen name to PeteMNguyen, bringing my all-time list of AIM screen names to 28. My rogues' gallery of AIM stupidity include: Airness238 (my first ever screen name, at age 15), T2pacalypse, AirPetey23, DMXtinction, Petezillah, Scorpioman23, and Pedroizm.

PeteMNguyen just looks so much more professional. And it's important to have a professional screen name, you know, so I can leave it on my resume and not worry about embarrassment.

I was talking to one of my friends on IM last night and she noticed my last name for the first time and asked how to pronounce it. Normally I wouldn't have minded the question, but then she remarked: "Isn't Nguyen for the Chinese what Smith is for Americans?"

Do I look Chinese to you or something? Jaimie, I'm Vietnamese.

Growing up, my teachers always butchered my last name while calling attendance. Pete Nuh-guy-yen? Pete N'goo-yen? Pete New-yen? Pete New-wen? For half of the school year, Mrs. Olsen still couldn't get it right, until finally she just started calling me Pete N.

There were times in my youth that I actually wished I was Chinese. I could have just been Pete Wong -- easy to pronounce, and it would have made my life a lot easier.

Even during my graduation ceremony they said it wrong.

And my all-time favorite is when my freshman year roommate Dan thought my name was Pete Nugent. No, Dan, I'm not related to Ted.

For all of you that still don't know, Nguyen is pronounced kind've like: "win" (update: I have decided the best way to say it is "ngwin?"). When you're watching the World Series of Poker, you're watching Scotty Win. When you're watching that Dallas Cowboys linebacker, you're watching Dat Win. Not Dat Nugent. Dat Win.

My name is Pete Win, and don't you ever forget that.